Tag: suicide

Suicidal Thoughts

God builds instincts within all life forms. One of the strongest is the desire to stay alive. Even plants have this. The spirit of suicide therefore must work a long time before winning the battle. This battle begins in the mind, is totally fought within the mind, and is won or lost in the mind. In reality, it is a “spiritual thought-life war.” Human beings are the only life form on earth that has this problem. This is a testimony to the fact that we are made much different from the animals and plants, and that we have an enemy that hates us.

Lying thoughts must overcome all what God had built inside us. The lies about us and this life are subtle at first. Then, if we hearken unto those voices more than truth voices (or thoughts), then we start believing lies. Demonic voices tend to say “Your life stinks, you have suffered pain for along time, no one cares about you (often the first lie), things will never change (ah, there’s the second lie), and death is better than this life” (this is THE BIG LIE). We have no way of knowing this last one is true. Moreover, life on earth is far better for an unsaved soul than the Lake of Fire that Jesus talked about. If we believe these lying thoughts to be true, especially that last one about death being better than life, then it makes logical sense to end our life. Therefore, suicidal people are not psychotic (crazy) but they have been overcome with lies. Even Job began to give way to wayward thoughts (voices). Perhaps because some of those voices did speak truth – his life, for example, did stink, but only for a while. Demons would have us believe that our lousy lives will never get better. In addition, the way his friends treated Job, it did seem like they really didn’t care about him. The truth is that thousands of people care about us, but they probably do not know what is going on in our mind.

Deception usually mixes truth with the lie so that we have a better chance of believing it. Deep inside our soul, I believe that we will believe the voices to which we give more listening time. One side will overpower the other eventually, but it takes time. We do not become suicidal overnight. This is why God tells us to dwell on things that are good, pure, honorable, lovely, of good repute, excellent, and worthy of praise (Philippians 4:8). It is also the reason I quote Scriptures back at demons when their wayward thoughts hit me. This is what Jesus did when Satan tried to get Him to throw Himself off a cliff. The Word of God is depicted as our sword and is the only offensive weapon God gives us. The rest are defensive ones (Ephesians 6:13-17).

What a person should do who is suicidal:

  1. Pray in Jesus’ name for help.
  2. Talk to someone who can help. Vent. Get all those feelings out. Commit to meeting with them more than once.
  3. Learn important Scriptures that you can quote back at demons who are lying to you. Here are some good ones:
  • Romans 8:1 – “There is therefore no condemnation for those in Christ Jesus.”
  • Romans 8:35-39 – Nothing can separate us from the love of God.
  • 2 Tim. 1:7 – “For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and love and sound mind.”
  • 2 Tim. 2:13 – Jesus always remains faithful to us.
  • John 16:33 – Jesus has overcome the world.
  • 1 John 3:1 – We are children of God.
  • Hebrews 7:25 – Jesus always makes intercession on our behalf.

How we can help someone being attacked by suicidal thoughts:

  1. Listen, especially if you are the first person they’ve told. They need to vent.
  2. Get further help and do not swear to secrecy (often they don’t want us to tell anyone).
  3. Connect the person to that help (go with them if necessary).
  4. Reveal to them that the battle begins in the mind, is fought in the mind, and is won or lost in the mind.
  5. Encourage them to begin a believing relationship with Jesus Christ if not already.
  6. From that relationship comes power and authority over demons who are placing typical thoughts in their mind such as: their life stinks, things will never change, no one knows how they feel, death is better than life.
  7. The suicidal person thinks they know reality, but they do not. Their perception has been distorted by Satan, the Destroyer. Tell them of God’s reality, which is – they are precious and important to God and He has a purpose for their life (hope) and he will wipe away every tear.
  8. Encourage them to serve others – this can be an antidote for the self-centeredness they are in.
  9. Let the person know you are committed to pray for them and will see it through all the way until they’ve won the victory.
  10. All these things do not have to be covered all at once. Give the Spirit time to work. Again, just listening helps them know someone really cares, and this is sometimes the initial stepping stone they need at that time.

I would like to underscore the idea that suicide battles are totally spiritual in nature. Minds are the port hole to the supernatural realm. Both God and demons will speak to us there. Some people believe that external circumstances such as poor home life, drug addiction, social rejection, or sudden loss of wealth are its cause. While these circumstances can certainly increase suicidal thoughts, they are not the real cause. If they were, every human that has experienced any of those things would automatically become suicidal, and we know this does not happen. So there must be a deeper, more insidious common cause. Jesus identified Satan as the father of all lies, a destroyer, a thief, and a murderer. Therefore, ultimately, we can identify him as the real source of suicide. People who fight and defeat the actual cause always have victory. I counsel people to rebuke demonic, suicidal thoughts in the name of JESUS! The Bible tells us that because Jesus had victory over Satan by never sinning and then offering Himself up as a perfect sacrifice for sin and then rising from the dead, He has ALL authority. Demons must obey His voice. So we all must get into a believing relationship with Him and then use His name to thwart all sorts of attacks against our minds (or souls).

Feedback:

NF – Wow what a excellent lesson here–really opened my eyes to how to deal with suicidal thoughts- thanks for sharing! (this dear friend of mine has dealt with this problem more than once, but has not had the problem for many years now).

PT – Dave, great topic and a difficult one. And as you mentioned Christians, including “mature” Christians, are sometimes tempted to commit suicide. The apostle Paul even despaired of life in the Book of Acts and the great prophet Elijah (or Elisha) even wished for death. I think your counsel is good counsel on the topic and I would add that suicide is very difficult for survivors (myself being one). The many unknowns surrounding suicide can be very difficult.

Is Euthanasia Ever Justified?

Many Christians seem to be opposed to this concept in all cases. For me, however, there may be a difference between putting someone to death and allowing them to die. Our technology has grown to the point of causing serious ethical questions. Doctors, for example, can keep someone “alive” for months who has had a life-threatening stroke.

I’ve had two difficult personal experiences with this issue. One of my best friends named Bob developed ALS (Lou Gehrig’s Disease). It is 100% fatal. It’s a nasty disease that slowly destroys muscle ability to move. When it hits the diaphragm, people cannot breathe on their own. Finally all internal movement goes and the person will die no matter what kind of life support they have access to. In Bob’s case, we fervently prayed for his healing. That never happened. He realized that God must be taking him home and he did not want surgery to open a new airway for a breathing machine to be hooked up to him. His wife and two children, however, insisted that he go through the procedure, so he did it for them. I visited him the next day in the hospital and when he saw me, he rolled his eyes back as if to say, “I knew this was a bad idea!” Of course, he still had a tube in his airway and could not speak, but clearly he was physically and mentally suffering from this procedure.

He was now dependent on that machine to inflate his lungs. He could not move any body part except his eyes, so he would signal things to his family by blinking. He could not even tell his family that he had an itch somewhere on his body. He was simply painfully existing with full mental capacity (horrible awareness).

His family eventually realized that they made Bob go through all this so they would not have to deal with his passing, so they finally gave Bob his wish. With some official people on hand, they “pulled the plug” and Bob slipped away to his Father in Heaven. This was back in 1986 and I miss him, but was happy for him.

I say all this to make the point that we cannot make a doctrine of “one size fits all” on this tough issue. We need to discern every case separately because there are many factors to consider. Would it have been wrong to allow Bob to die naturally from ALS without putting him through the pain and torment of “extended life?” I do not see sin in this decision if Bob was okay with it.

Many Christians, rightfully so, are concerned with giving the okay in the above example becoming a “slippery slope” to all sorts of wrongful deaths. I agree that we need to be on the alert for such a mindset. This does not cancel, however, the loving concern in Bob’s case. There are many people who are suffering but not from a fatal disease and they want to die. Again, these need to be decided on a case by case basis. We certainly do not advocate suicide.

My other case in 2009 involved my dad who always insisted that if he became severely incapacitated, that we not put him on life support. People can opt for DNR (do not resuscitate). This was my dad’s choice and he made it while being fully mentally aware of the ramifications. At age 89, he had a massive stroke and in spite of us recognizing what happened very soon and getting him to the best of care for strokes in Buffalo’s Millard Filmore Hospital, the experts diagnosed the seriousness of his condition and told us that he would be “a handful” to take care of if he survived. While I do not think that this factor should be part of a life-death decision, we did honor his prior DNR request. Doctors assured us that they could make him comfortable with drugs until he passed.

My sister and I also had to consider our mom. She had just been diagnosed with a serious carotid artery (main vessel to the brain) blockage that needed surgery (probably to save her life) and her doctor told her to keep her emotional stress levels low until her scheduled operation! She did remarkably well through the ordeal and is doing very well as of today at age 89. My sister and I had many Christian friends praying through this family ordeal and I believe that God’s will was done.

In conclusion, it is sometimes difficult to formulate a “one size fits all” doctrine in Christianity. I think, however, we need to reject the broad philosophy of Jack Kevorkian, commonly known as “Dr. Death.” There are, of course, many factors to consider when faced with this issue. In Bob’s case, his access to technology only served to prolong intense suffering imposed onto him by others and his family finally realized they were being selfish. We all want to uphold the great value of life that God gives us, but at the same time, we need to have the Holy Spirit’s discernment to make decisions…not always an easy task.

Feedback:

Gary R – Well now you have ventured into the veritable “slippery slope.” Frankly, lets get real here. HOSPICE CARE is nothing more than euthanasia. They put these horribly ill poor people in these so called care facilities then fill them up with morphine in the interest of “comfort” until they pass out, stop breathing, and die. I personally witnessed my best friend Ray Fletcher put down like a dog. This happens DAILY, minute by minute in this country and NO ONE does a thing about it. The Bible is out the window and the world takes over. Frankly, they are killing the wrong people.

Mike M – I volunteered at a hospice (Isaiah House) for many years. I never saw what is described [above]. People were made comfortable, but never drugged to death.

Chris L – Wow, what an interesting contrast. What are the Bible verses that Gary believes are thrown out the window? I could be unfairly judging, but my guess is that he is relying on his experiences and gut feelings rather than an actual sound interpretation of scripture. I’m not sure scripture ever directly addresses the issue; at best one’s opinion on the topic comes from an indirect application of an interpretation of scripture. Certainly have to be careful about that…

I do know that God commands us to do unto others what we would want done to us, love others, respect others, respect elders, care for the sick and poor, etc. that can probably justify a whole range of opinions on the issue. As you know, I thought yours and mom’s decision with respect to Grandpa was absolutely made out of love, respect, goodness, wisdom, etc. But could it has been wrong? I don’t know. I feel like people do things wrong all the time, every day, and yet sometimes the decisions actually made out of a right motivation are what people harp on. It’s like Satan’s great distraction to make people so focused on debating this very difficult issue that they can forget to operate out of love when even doing so. Same with abortion and other tough topics.

At some point, my opinion is that we can’t unilaterally characterize certain actions as right or wrong with an evaluation of the heart that only God can do. Maybe some people pull the plug for completely selfish reasons that God despises. Maybe others do not pull the plug out of selfish reasons that equally concerns God. I would assume that anyone actually struggling with the issue is at least at the right starting point…it might be evenĀ  more important to respect the difficulties than to take a firm stand either way.

Frankly, though, my initial reaction to Gary may be unfair. To me, his comments seem ignorant, destructive, and not at all how God would want Christians to respond to this issue. But am I guilty of being too concerned about sounding sophisticated and really only pretending to be loving while missing the simple plain truth that Gary is right? Am I missing that Gary is really speaking out of a sincere conviction born out of deep prayer and personal experience? Has he prayed more about this issue and received more insight than me? Maybe. But I still think his approach is totally inappropriate though…so I can’t help myself from judging him…

Pat T – Thanks for sharing these heartfelt testimonies with us. I hope they inspire others to make “advance directives” (a legal document) about their end of life care so they and others do not have to go through any needless suffering. I agree it is very difficult for families and other loved ones to make such decisions and not all people agree as to what is best, but in the end it makes it all the more difficult in what to do if ones wishes are not made in advance. My wife had made her decisions known about her end of life care to others and our doctor after much prayer and counsel in which I am very grateful. It made her passing with her loved ones by her side with the appropriate care (hospice) to relieve any needless pain. When the MS had ravished her body to the point where she could not move, speak, or swallow, as difficult as it was to let her go, I knew her life would be so much better in heaven than for her to be put on life support. I also knew it would have been selfish of me to keep her alive (I had that option) when she had already made her end of life care decisions known. Also, most hospitals have a default policy to resuscitate all patients who do not declare an advance directive regardless of their condition. And even if one has declared an advance directive to not resuscitate (DNR), it is not automatic if it not made known to all hospital staff. My own mom had this happen to her when she stopped breathing in a hospital even though she had declared not to be resuscitated in a written advance directive. We watched helplessly for weeks her body kept alive in an vegetative state only to have to make the painful decision to unplug her. Something that should not have happened. Also, advance directives are not etched in stone, sometimes life support is necessary for a brief period of time to keep someone alive to bounce back (doctors can help here). Again, I know this is a very personal decision and every circumstance if unique and requires much prayer and counsel before you let someone go to their heavenly Father. Thanks Dave for bringing this topic up for discussion.

Q & A: Is Suicide Always Wrong?

Dave – Hebrews 9:27 states, “And inasmuch as it is appointed for men to die once and after this comes judgment.” So can I argue that if I killed myself today, that this was my appointed time? I say no because I can argue that I preempted God’s plan for my life which makes my action wrong. To be clear here, I am not talking about someone jumping on a live grenade to save others. I am talking about the willful act of ending one’s soul-life before “its time.” I am also not addressing the controversy of euthanasia for a sufferer either. This is a separate issue for me. Therefore, I contend that suicide in the context that I’ve laid out here is always wrong.

The next question is can a Christian who commits suicide still have eternal life? Many believers quote 1 Corinthians 3:16-17 for this issue, “Do you not know that you are a temple of God and that the Spirit of God dwells in you? If any man destroys the temple of God, God will destroy him, for the temple of God is holy, and that is what you are.” This certainly sounds like the person is in deep trouble on Judgment Day. The Lake of Fire (Hell) does destroy both body and soul according to Jesus (Matthew 10:28). To be honest, however, I am having trouble making a blanket judgment for all Christian suicide cases. Saul/Paul, however, did kill some Christians and yet was forgiven and has eternal life. I look forward to your thoughts. I’ll deal with euthanasia next time.

Feedback:

Gary R – Biblically speaking, suicide is wrong as 1 COR 3:16-17 tells us. Speaking from the human standpoint, Bible aside if that’s possible, from the moment of birth us humans work so hard to LIVE! It’s inconceivable to me one could end your own life, obviously in the depths of despair, but God’s Word, indeed has all the answers. I think suicide is always wrong.

Nick C – When you look at the Scriptures, there are many people who seemed to be plagued with suffering and pain. Job is the most notable. He said, “May the day of my birth perish” (Job 3:3, 11). Samson killed himself along with the Philistines. King Saul fell on his own sword. Judas committed suicide. The Bible doesn’t soft pedal those deaths. The Bible says it’s the Lord who gives and takes away (1 Sam. 2:6).

Pat T – I’ve had a relative who was schizophrenic who committed suicide and even had an evangelical pastor (business exec.) who suffered terribly from deep depression who took his own life. Both were confessing Christians. Even my wife who was sexually abused as a child for years by a family member had tried to take her life (never succeeded, thank God). And though I believe suicide is sin and we don’t have the right to take our own life, I too believe God has to make the final judgment on their destiny, especially those who are not in their right mind. Even King Saul fell on his own sword to end his life and other prominent figures in Scripture had wished for death. But God also warns us in Revelation that the cowardly do not enter heaven, which I believe to include those who bow out of life because life has been tough. Suicide is not of God or His way to die.

It is not the unforgivable sin as Jesus described in Matt. 12:31. All sins, past present and future where forgiven and paid for on the cross. All sins includes taking your own life. The problem is some people say the suicide victim never confessed their suicide to be forgiven. But, then where is grace? Unbelief is the only sin that keeps you from God’s grace. If salvation depended upon my ability to confess all my sins, I’d be hopelessly lost because who can remember them all? We all sin in ways we are not aware of. What happens to the guy that dies in a car wreck instantly who just stole a candy bar or lied or looked at porn or swore before he could confess his sin?

I believe suicide victims who are children of God are not sent to hell. They still are redeemed into heaven. There is nowhere in the Bible God says a suicide victim goes to hell.

You have to come to grips with Jesus saying nothing can snatch his children from his hand, nothing separates his children from his love, we are adopted so can we be unadopted? We are sealed by the Holy Spirit. Can we be unsealed?

Jesus can and does heal those struggling with suicidal thoughts.

Those are my initial thoughts. I had a Christian friend commit suicide many years ago after he found his Christian wife in his bed with another man. The pain was too much to bear. He loved Jesus. I believe he is in heaven.

I believe that verse in 1 Cor. 3 is talking about defiling the church which is God’s temple, not our bodies.

Cindi L – Dave, well said. Suicide is one of the toughest issues for me mainly because of confronting the very issue of eternal life and being fairly close to individuals who struggle their whole lives with depression. What makes it tough is it’s the last act someone does, which makes us question the “typical” repentance aspect. I find myself not offering definites to anyone on the subject because I know our Loving God knows way more than us, the beginning, and the end and I leave it in His hands. I have witnessed some things that bother me when Christians on occasion “claim with certainty” that the person “went to heaven.” I think is a dangerous message to endorse as it may lead others who struggle to choose suicide because it offers them a “faster way out” to what they think is a definite “better world or place.” We must be cautious and though our hearts go out to all those families and friends that go through this horrible tragedy (it is so tough on those left in its wake), I usually choose to say my Hope would be that they are in heaven and with certainty we can TOTALLY TRUST God in this situation. As usual, it’s best left in God’s Hand, and defer our opinions to His.

Chris L – All really interesting thoughts… and good initial analysis from you. I think in some way, like mom said, it’s dangerous to ever speculate on anyone’s eternal destiny and I think Jesus being ‘the Door’ is basically Jesus warning that He – not man – decides who comes in and out. Sometimes I think in our attempt to support that claim (that Jesus is the Door) we can run the risk of actually defeating the whole purpose. The point is that He decides, basically warning us not to do so! And who else would we want to make that call? Especially with these questions (suicide, whether you are sealed, whether you haven’t heard the name ‘Jesus’, whether you are 9 years old, etc.)…you definitely don’t want me making those calls – God knows my own judgments would only flip back on me the moment I make them!

But at the same time, we can certainly affirm that God doesn’t like suicide or the mental illnesses that
leads to it or any suffering at all. It would therefore be our to job to ask God how we fight against that in
our lives and the lives of others. Whether that includes telling people they may not go to heaven if they
do, I’m not sure. I’m not sure that would be the best approach, but if it convinces people not to commit
suicide, then great. Good stuff

Cindi L – This was great feedback to read. The Scriptural suicides that were mentioned would be interesting to hear commentaries on from your group. For example, I would question whether Saul or Judas were destined for heaven in contrast with Samson’s decision. Samson’s seems a lot more like your first analogy of someone diving on a bomb to save more lives act. It was interesting to me that these were all lumped together.

Dave – Clearly, there is a difference between Samson’s death and Judas’. Saul’s soul is a mystery to me, not so much how he died (he was mortally wounded so he would have died without falling onto his sword) but that he was so backslidden.

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